Things I Wish I'd Said - Album

by Heartwork

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1.
Every Thorn 03:21
Lyrics: The shit had hit the fan Turns out I’m half the man I thought I would be And the worst part is I think I liked it I fixed myself and broke a heart Raised a glass up to my health and smoked enough To choke the life right out of hiding Serotonin and alcohol go hand in hand Until you’ve had one too many and you’ve never felt anything like that Nine months spent on the couch Inside my parents’ house or on somebody’s floor Comfort came and went with balance When things went south I headed west Learned not to open my big mouth and save my breath In the end it’s just something that happened Time and time again I’ve told myself “no more” But a kick to the senses and I’ll raise my defences like before You’ve got to get lost at least just once before you’ve found A bruise that’s worth the bluish mark Cuz thicker skin is worth the scar Once you’ve figured it all out A year or three ago I let some pieces go but still kept the ‘me’ I erased the photos but saved the old clothes I wanted this I needed that Separated bits of good out from the bad And I saw that every thorn still has it’s rose Seeking counsel from sinking ships out in the storm Makes as much sense as writing when you should’ve been fighting all along
2.
Butterfly 03:31
Lyrics: They said I’d fucked up So I knew there was nothing left to do but cast a stone Then came the fires through the night That spread with fast delight to level Rome I thought you’d have known about the sound of giving in Then with a bloodied souvenir and the comfort of your peers you took your turn And though the words rang loud and clear I knew the rage was insincere You weren’t the first That made it worse So here’s to wasting all away Just to return some day So I’ve seen it in the scriptures of a dozen strangers’ rooms It was hanging with the pictures on a wall I knew It should’ve happened in a hotel but it started on the bridge It was never gonna go well and it never did I could play and never win Just like a butterfly you got your way So with a solace cigarette The smoke itself should help forget our little deal I’ll fuel myself with free caffeine Whilst never knowing what it means to really heal The way I feel This is the sound of giving in
3.
Lyrics: I try to do the right thing but I’m partial to the wrong With no idea just where I get it from It’s like this blackness in my heart Wish I could crack this but I can’t Still it’s secondary to this head I’ve got Meet me at the deep end and we’ll go headfirst into another episode Cuz I get off on seeing what I can get away with And I want this more than you could know I try to keep my head up high but I’m knee-deep in the woes It’s just like me to write my cons in prose Getting by on a wing and a prayer But never really getting anywhere I guess we all know how the sad song goes... If only I could ever just say “no” But the devil on my shoulder won’t let me go With all the trying and the failing I should just accept who I am But when I see my friends, it’s apparent that’s a terrible fucking plan Free me from this gutless alibi because I’ve never felt such guilt in my whole life Now I’ll confess that the feeling never stuck around too long Because the wrong thing always felt so right, yeah
4.
Lyrics: There was a thought process that I can’t quite recall When I was drunk beyond repair and barely standing strong at all I’d grown accustomed to the kerbside by your house But that’s no excuse for the concrete feeling that I’m feeling now I’ve got a catalogue of things I’ve felt at 2am But now I’m looking for the sense in all the things I wish I’d said I used to know this old town like the back of my hand But now I can’t see past my nose So I’m following a road that’s led me to Your white like paper door and that car bought by your dad It’s a sign that I never saw You’re out of line and I know for sure That you’re still here on my back And there’s not a damn thing I can do about that I left a message but you can’t have found it still Because I haven’t heard a thing and I don’t think I ever will And on the journey home it came from out the blue There was a thought process but it’s not like I’d ever thought it through I used to know this old town like the back of my hand But now I can’t see past my nose So I’m following a road that’s led me to Your white like paper door and that car bought by your dad It’s a sign that I never saw You’re out of line and I know for sure That you’re still here on my back Now there’s not a damn thing that I’ll do about that
5.
Water 04:49
Lyrics: It always starts like a tidal wave A rush of blood, it’s hard to explain On nights like that I’m stuck on replay It comes and goes but it never stays A quote I’ve known since back when I was young If I’ve heard it once, I’ve heard it far too much We’re either making war or making love Well if that’s true then I’m truly fucked Now I don’t need more sleep I’ll be fine like this I’ll get used to it Yes, I’ve thought about drugs and more selfish things But in the end just bring me water I’ll wear my dissonance upon my sleeve Tried to replace it with harmony Can I redo my place in history? It would be better than being me So I’ll begin as I mean to go on Repressing memories and where they come from It always starts reminding me of The quiet cries of the boy I was Now I don’t need more sleep I’ll be fine like this I’ll get used to it Yes, I’ve thought about drugs and more selfish things But in the end just bring me water If I could face you myself I’d do everything I could to give you hell But it won’t change a single card that I’ve been dealt And I’m doing fine Can you not tell? Now I won’t leave a piece of myself behind No, you’ll get the whole thing So don’t burn me just place me in the sea And I will be one with the water
6.
Playing Dead 03:43
Lyrics: I know what you’ll say but I’m not gonna stay for too long I don’t wanna drink cuz I hate what I think when I’m gone And I can’t remember the last time I felt I was feeling better than what I feel now I’ve been playing dead since the day I was left to myself I know how it sounds but I can’t keep it down in my shell So call me a liar Call me what you want I have no desire to try prove you wrong What am I so sad about? Wish I could figure all this out before it’s too late What am I still crying for? It’s never been this bad before Happiness better be worth the wait You know what I’ll say, something like “I won’t stay for too long” But make sure I don’t find my own way back home cuz I’m not In the best mindset You probably know I shouldn’t be inside of my room all alone No, don’t let me...
7.
Lyrics: You’ve got hours out here in the sun, still you say “it’s not enough” Now these flowers will burn like my lungs as my nerves all turn to dust Oh, darling I sympathise but I will not let you off It’s been one too many times, that’s it, I’m done I’ve been holding so close to my chest, the cards that keep me safe So when it comes to placing my bet I’ll know which hand to play Oh, honey I’m still on your side but I also see their point So I don’t mean to criticise when I say you’re just paranoid So long, I’m so gone half the way to anywhere but here So I’m leaving and breathing better than I ever thought I would without you dear We’ve got plenty of times to play games so go hide and I’ll come seek Through a focus on these fictional frames that I made when I was eighteen Oh, baby I’ve got your back, but have you got mine? There comes a point when you lose your tact, it’s just when I did I also lost my mind So long, I’m so gone half the way to anywhere but here So I’m leaving and breathing better than I ever thought I would without you dear So meet me at the back of the bar with all your scars in view I’ll leave with a grip on your heart like this was all for you Oh, sweetie just drag me down the way you always said You would if you had found your way with me back then
8.
Lyrics: It turned black and you were acting out of character I won’t get used to seeing you like that You hung confessions of all your indiscretions around your neck Convinced yourself you won’t take them back But take them back The sky fell and I could tell you’d almost had enough It looked like rain but felt just like glass My intuition excels at premonition but I admit I didn’t think it would hit you this hard But it hit you hard I can’t pretend I hate to say “I told you so” There’s plenty of skeletons in your closet gathering dust on the bones You’ve got a lot of nerve but not enough sinew Having that inheritance isn’t God’s gift It’s all man made just like you You came round on the floor of your bedroom with no idea of the time As cracks of light bled through from outside Over-exposure, your eyes can barely cope with the things they’ve seen That doesn’t mean you can stay out of sight That doesn’t mean you can stay out of sight I can’t pretend I hate to say “I told you so” There’s plenty of skeletons in your closet gathering dust on the bones You’ve got a lot of nerve but not enough sinew Having that inheritance isn’t God’s gift It’s all man made just like you Now you’re not who you are on paper It’s all thanks to your attitude that you’ve turned into a stranger Now all that’s left is ink and material things Where once there was a heart is now a pulse that’s barely beating You compensate your influence with nothing more than pure ambivalence Towards the tricks you’ve pulled a million times I can’t pretend I hate to say “I told you so” There’s plenty of skeletons in your closet gathering dust on the bones You’ve got a lot of nerve but not enough sinew Having that inheritance isn’t God’s gift It’s all man made It’s all man made like you
9.
Saintlike 05:08
Lyrics: Hellbent on getting to the top but hardly holding on These ropes are more like strings I’ve been going back on words, the promises are worse Like I never meant a thing Trying not to give in to the shove As the push takes of the gloves and beats me to the floor This train’s coming off its rails The ship is set to sail and waiting by the shore I’d rather be cold in bed with her than warm by myself I could do this alone but I’d prefer it if I had her help She has her faith and I have this way of putting it down But the truth is I’m scared when I need her there she won’t be around I need her now Quiet with the patience of a saint As she does her best to wait for miracles to intervene I score delicate at best As I try hard to contest against the way that I have been Why is my head not on my side? There’s a ghost in place of pride and it just went through the wall Just like me it needs a fix Please replace my nerves with bricks so I won’t feel a thing at all I’d rather be half of something good than on my own, whole and great I’ll risk losing my mind on something true than stay sane for what’s fake She’s got her ideals and I’ve got this real fear that I don’t match up I don’t know what for cuz she says she’s sure that I’m more than enough I just wish I could trust I’d rather ignore the odds than know that I’ve made a safe bet I’ll forgive the loss if she has to go but I won’t forget That she has this knack of keeping me intact when I start to come loose Though I’m not convinced that heaven exists, she’s almost the proof If only she knew
10.
Lyrics: When you’re driving in your car and you’re not sure where you are, does it feel like you’re alone? Do you ever picture me sat in the passenger seat singing with the stereo? I can hear the argument playing over in my head like it was just yesterday As your tears left tiny tracks I drove my fist into your dash and it never looked the same And you still plead innocence as you break your false pretence like you did that night in May Sat in park quiet and still as your heart sank beneath the wheel You will never fucking change If you saw this coming then you should’ve driven away So next time you’re in your car and you don’t know where you are, you can deal with it alone

credits

released May 19, 2017

Recorded from September 2016 to February 2017

Daniel O’Dell - All guitars, bass, additional percussion, programming, vocals, production & engineering

Jake Hatter - Drums

Matty Moon - Drum engineering, additional production, mixing & mastering at Half Ton Studios in Cambridge

Benjamin Sydes - Additional vocals on 'The Right Thing'

Adam Boucher - Additional vocal production on 'The Right Thing'

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Heartwork Bridgend, UK

Emotive Rock from the UK.

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